Maintaining a regular sex life is not easy, especially if you can’t find a like-minded partner. Or are confused as to how to find someone with who you can have sex with no strings attached. Most people call such an arrangement a friend with benefits situation.
Some call it fuck buddies—whatever the label, the meaning of it is simple. You are looking for someone you can have sex with no conditions to it, with no emotions attached to it. You are in this for your pleasure, and so is your fuck buddy.
In this feature, we will look at what exactly is a fuck buddy and how to find one.
What is a Fuck Buddy?
Fuck buddy is someone who you can have sex with without the embroilment of any non-sexual communication, matrimonial expectations, engagement, or exclusivity. A fuck-buddy will not question why you and them can’t meet more regularly or if they look desirable in that dress. This kind of system is just to meet each other’s sexual demands, and that is it, nothing more!
How Do You Find a Fuck Buddy?
Before you go off looking for anyone who can satisfy your sexual needs, you have to remember some things. If you want to have sex on an informal and consistent basis, you require to be certain.
You have to be confident the whole time, you have to move boldly, talk assuredly, and essentially, be ready to have sex confidently.
But why is confidence so important?
It is critical because if you pause for even one moment if you are not ready to make precise eye contact, or if your voice breaks, it will completely damage your chances of encountering that fuck buddy.
When you engage with someone, you have to guarantee they are aware of what you are looking for. They have to know that you only require sex and not a possible romantic relationship. This is something that needs to be established way before you risk becoming entangled in emotions.
Now, that we have those two mandates out of the way, here are some common methods to find a friend with benefit.
College grounds are packed with men and women ready to sexually explore. If you are someone who is in college currently, then you should be getting the full enjoyment of all the potential for obtaining a fuck buddy for yourself.
This includes weddings, birthday parties, or housewarming gatherings. As a custom that rules our lives, your odds of a sexual rendezvous are more if you accomplish to go to more social functions.
Coffee Shop or Bookstore
People endure hours in the same place for some time, and you can always find someone with their head bowed over a book or a laptop in a bookstore or cafe. For example, you can walk into a Starbucks, observe someone doodling for hours. You can always walk over and question what they are doing, which, when they are willing and open, will start a conversation. You get their number and in some days, you can attach them to your sex roster.
Suppose, you love swimming, then you can meet someone at a swimming club. If you choose to use your weekend at a ballroom dancing class, then allow someone to dance after with you in your bedroom. Women prefer to notice men do something they are skilled at. Men like observing women who share their hobbies. So, the more skilled you are at your preferred hobby, the more immeasurable your chances are of having sex regularly.
Nightclubs or Bars
Bars and nightclubs are often meant for one-night stands, but it is nevertheless possible to develop that inebriated sexual rendezvous into more. With that concluded, bars and nightclubs usually end up in lots of chilly approaches. Like sportsmen understand that not every kick will give to the goal, you also must be able to meet some fails before getting there.
Friends and Roommates
This has a low percentage of making you a friend with benefits, but a low percentage does not imply no opportunities. If you are in your mid-twenties and you share a room with someone, you can engage with someone who is in transition, like an unexpected career move. Your roommate could be, therefore, be someone who’s in the city right now for a limited time. This indicates your hookup buddy arrangement would mean zilch to you and them.
Though you can invariably discover a fuck buddy through your roommates and friends, by social events, on the college campus, in bookstores, bars, coffee shops, and nightclubs, there are many other, more expeditious, beneficial methods. Since there are way too many scams throughout (read: “Hot singles in your area!”), SnapSext, CasualX, Feeld, Blendr, etc., are apps that will get you a fuck buddy through reliable, legal means.
Rules to Follow For a Thriving Fuck Buddy Arrangement
You got your fuck buddy, cool. But do you know what to do next? Here are some rules you NEED to follow.
Be Sure About What You Want
Some people might think that starting a friend with benefits arrangement would instantly transform into a full-fledged relationship. But this is equal to building a castle on sand. Your fuck buddy can’t be a prospective romantic partner, so don’t make it regular. Keep your distance.
When it comes to your emotions, stay neutral. You can’t get attached. This means you can’t feel jealous if you see them with someone else. However, if you do start to feel jealous, it’d be better to stop the arrangement instantly.
Communicate, But Not Too Often
While telling each other what you want in bed is encouraged and so are discussing limits, don’t communicate too much beyond this. That means, don’t text them randomly asking how their day is going. This doesn’t keep you in the neutral and it might put them off.
Maintain a Balance
Don’t hook up too often. Once or twice a week is fine—if you do more than that, you risk the danger of getting too attached.
Don’t Stay The Night
It’s critical to know that because you are sleeping with someone, you don’t particularly have to sleep over. It’s absolutely okay to leave after you’re done.
Sex can be an excellent method to destress and it is definitely plenty of fun. A friend with benefits situation is beneficial when you want sex but not the relationship. When you find the right person, it’s fulfilling for you both. As an adult, it’s obvious we have needs and to satisfy them with a willing, consenting person is important. However, you also need to know how it works and when to step back. Lastly, you can stop this arrangement any time you want, so be safe and have fun!